The Adoption Blogosphere: Not Always Thinking Happy Thoughts

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6 Responses

  1. Ansley says:

    Everything you've said is true. You win my next linky-do.

    (a poem for you, Ken)


  2. Ansley says:

    I think it takes alot on the part of adoptive parents to admit to the 'downside' of adoption. If they admit adoption isn't always love and roses (or for that matter, legal and ethical) then they have to admit their own culpability. So, who can blame them? I accept my culpability by saying, "I'm the 3rd best thing to happen to my son". Some people can't do the same. Regardless, adoption is driven by adoptive parents. I truly believe it.

    I don't think Harry and Bertha Holt set out to create an industry, but adoption has evolved into one. Much liked racism, if those in power (whites/ adoptive parents) don't set forth to enact change- change will continue to elude us.

    In the end, as always, it is our children who have no say in the equation, yet adoption affects them more than anyone else in the triad. I don't really think adoptees need to cut us much slack. (Especially if we act like idiots on par with the current case 'en pointe'.)

    Let's 'throw down' together. I've got a case of the stabbies myself!

  3. N says:

    I'm marginally in your target demographic on this one, but can't muster the energy to go get myself angry off-site.

  4. Rosalea says:

    I just wish that skepticism was not such a "dirty" word in our society….to have the ability to analyze data…or to take a good look at information that is contradictory to our personal beliefs (or what we WANT to believe)…takes determination and insight …and requires the ability to put aside the natural human tendency to just "be right"….the majority of folks that check out the anti-adoption blogs will most likely be leaning in that direction anyway…same thing with the happy-happy-joy-joy folks…and will only be seeking to confirm what they believed in the first place…therefore, any opinion that differs will be met with resistance….and the "like-minded" will jump on board to squelch the opposition so everyone can skip back to their self-created fantasy lands….

    It applies to nearly every way of thinking…not just adoption…although that subject is so near and dear to my heart….

    although it makes me CRAZY with frustration, frequenting other boards that regularly assert opinions that are toxic and vicious has helped me stay in tune with some of the thought processes that my beautiful children (both adopted and bio) will have to contend with someday…After all, knowledge is power and teaching/learning critical thinking skills is high on my priority list…can't get a much better lesson than butting heads with an opposing point of view!!

    Great post, Ken!! and BTW…I am ALWAYS ready for a "throw-down"….wink…


  5. Rosalea says:

    hey..also wanted to mention….by the number of PM's I get, there are PLENTY of folks on that "other" board that are craving a different point of view..but are terrified of posting…(which sort of cracks me up…but is again a psychological mind set…the "fear" of being the "only" one that thinks a certain way…or to be called out as the opposing point of view…there are some fascinating studies about "pressure to conform" )

    anyway….just thought I would mention that your posts are missed on the other forum and your opinion is always highly regarded…


  6. Astonied says:

    Is it snarky to say that I have always wondered what people on BB's who tell others to whom they are not related to "shut up" do in their own household when their own wife won't "shut up".

    Do I have to report myself for this comment?