The Case of the Dog Who Barked Stupidly
Like any other law-centric blog, we get our share of attorney spam here. It is unpleasant, as it clogs the drain and gets in the way of other people directly addressing the posts and calling me dumb in the comments.
We briefly toyed with the notion of confronting the law-spammers by assuming that they were innocent naïfs, led astray by marketers to whom they had, in the parlance of these things, outsourced their ethics. It was unsatisfying, not least because the lawyers stop responding to your queries if they think you are going to delete the spam and move on. And so we return to our old ploy of outing the fools and engaging in a public shaming.
In a recent post regarding the admissibility of Wikipedia as evidence and vicious, vicious Border Collie mixes, we received a comment from a confused party named 'dogattorney'. Though it was a fairly straightforward post, the entirety of the comment was "I don't get it." It almost makes you think that the commenter is actually a dog; it is unlikely he is a very good attorney.
But no, the comment wasn't left by a dog. Nor, actually, was the comment left by an attorney. These particular idiots, who appear to be confused about their claimed expertise, can be found at DogAttorney dot com, a nationwide attorney referral service for dog bite victims.
What to do, then, if there is no one person we can "out" and embarrass? The site offers no hint of which lawyers have signed up for a dog-bite site that advertises by spamming blog comments. If you wanted to know, you might find out by calling the number (1-888-7DOGBITES*) and providing a location, in response to which they may give you a contact. Or you could fill out their online form. Then you could ask that attorney — why are you a member of a network that advertises through spam? Or you could post their names here in the comment section.
Of course, if you've bitten by a dog and want to leave a message for "John Donahue, Top Dog Bite Lawer [sic]" (seriously, "lawer"?) all about the miraculous 96 hour cubic time day, and why 24 HOUR TIME IS NOTHING BUT A VICIOUS LIE PERPETRATED BY FRAUDS AND CHILD MURDERERS, and your dog bite, of course, we're sure he'd be happy to hear about it.
After all, he wanted us, and you, to know all about his prowess as a world-renowned dogbite lawyer.
I can hear you saying "That's unfair, Popehat! They didn't even hire the marketer who spammed your blog." But you know what they say:
If you lie down with dogs, you'll end up with fleas.
*7 dog bites? I'd say you have a pretty good case!
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