Defense Attorneys' Children Thank You For Their Private School Education.

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18 Responses

  1. C. S. P. Schofield says:

    Ostensible reason for conviction; Possession of Marijuana with intend to sell.

    Actual reason for conviction; Being without one functioning brain cell.

    I mean, is it silly of me to expect that a jury, once told this story, will think "Hell, I don't want this idiot running loose. What if he decides to play with matches?"?

  2. The real question is why they even bothered to leave the house, being that they were clearly on drugs when they hatched this whole plan.

  3. ElamBend says:

    Millage Peaks for the fourth time, clearly that's an indicator of a family-borne problem of intelligence.

  4. eddie says:

    "U have no clue how clutch u r"

    I have no clue how clutch she is, either.

  5. Brandon says:

    Civil disobedience?

  6. TJIC says:

    I took a week long woodworking class in Vermont once.

    While there I learned that most Vermont woodworkers make ends meet by diversification: 20% woodworking, and 80% growing weed which they sell to Boston kids.

    Vermont is a HELL of a lot closer to this market than anything on the West Coast.

  7. Hell, I could have hooked the dude up.

  8. Not Sure says:

    "Honestly, sometimes the cops must feel like they’re clubbing baby seals."

    If only. But I guess they probably *do* get tired of shooting dogs, don't they?

  9. C. S. P. Schofield says:

    Professor Coldheart,

    My dear sir, I sincerely hope you would have recognized within minutes that you were dealing with a pair of energetic morons and sent them away with a flea in their ears. It amazes me that anyone was willing to sell them anything of questionable legality; they must obviously be trouble looking for somebody to happen to.

  10. SPQR says:

    Sheesh, they never heard of UPS?

  11. CTrees says:

    Ah, UPS: America's least unreliable major package carrier*

    *based solely on my experience, which comes from tracking packages every working day.

  12. the other rob says:

    Reminds me of the famous quote from the British police sergeant, who said "If you want to know how stupid the average criminal is, consider that he's caught by the average cop." Or words to that effect.

  13. Jeff Hall says:

    It doesn't matter how much of the drug is in LA, San Fransisco, or Boston. It just matters what the prices are. If they could had cheap enough supplier in S.F., or if the quality of the "product" could command a high enough price, then it would be profitable to sell in Boston.

    Since they did it 9 times, it must have been a profitable endeavor. Or maybe they lost money on each venture, and were trying to make it up on volume.

  14. Scott Jacobs says:

    For a touch of hilarity, when I saw a Jeff Hall had commented here, I was momentarily terrified that my lawyer had found this blog.

    Thankfully, it is not the same Jeff Hall, so I am safe.

  15. Dan says:

    From the article: "In interviews with authorities, Peaks offered a detailed explanation of the system devised by he and Perez to get drugs onboard planes."

    This seems to violate the shutupshutupshutupshutupshutup rule. I suppose you should expect this from such a criminal mastermind. Wouldn't his seemingly-connected father have access to a defense attorney during questioning?

  16. Jeff Hall says:

    > Thankfully, it is not the same Jeff Hall, so I am safe.

    At least for now.

  17. Rich Rostrom says:

    Michael Crichton (and his brother Douglas) wrote a novel about this: Dealing or The Berkeley-to-Boston Forty-Brick Lost-Bag Blues – in 1972.

  18. IgotBupkis, President, United Anarchist Society says:

    I have long been noting that one of the most unfortunate qualities associated with civilization is that it inevitably protects idiots from their stupidity. Randall Munroe, of XKCD fame did a wonderful toon in which he suggests that average IQ is not going down. I would accept that, but believe average wisdom — common sense — is tanking fast. Things that even an idiot a couple generations ago would have had sense not to do seem… entirely unobvious to a very large proportion of the population.

    Now, pre-civilization, these fools would have made their errors, and been prey for this or that species, or died from the results of their foolishness. Nowadays, we've wiped out the predators for the most part (excepting for the two-legged variety, of course) and medical science saves too many of the rest. So they live and breed.

    Put more simply:
    Too Much Tiger Food.
    Not Enough Tigers.
    We Need More Tigers!