Journal of the Great Shutdown, Day Six

Clark is still missing. We're worried, but haven't given up hope. Yet.

Pray with us, for Clark's sake.

Bub 2

Last 5 posts by Patrick Non-White

Comments

  1. Partick says

    I couldn't be happier about this development. Maybe I should revise my opinion of the legislative jackassery that has brought us to this point

  2. JohnC says

    My guess is we'll learn that what began as an anti-government rant somehow ended with Clark in jail for attempting to murder all the pandas at the zoo for some reason.

  3. Zemalkop says

    I won't stand for Popehat mandated prayer. I will just have a moment of silence for Clark, and there's nothing you can do about it.

  4. AlphaCentauri says

    "You guys trying to steal my stash of canned tuna and toilet paper? You're gonna have to pry it from my cold, dead hands."

  5. gramps says

    He won't do a day for attempted pandacide. The cameras are off because of Bush, or is it Reagan, or maybe Haliburton… anyway there will be no video evidence and there is no money to pay real investigators. Perfect storm!

  6. Wayne Clemons says

    I saw a squirrel with half a tail running across a telephone wire. Freaked me out. I don't know how much more of this shutdown I can take.

  7. Ryan says

    In a bout of cosmic irony, a right-leaning anarcho-capitalist has decided that Clark's possessions and wife are a great deal to his liking and, since this person neither acknowledges nor fears the legitimacy of the now-defunct state, Clark is currently being chopped up and canned with a little bit of lemon for winter rations.

    May he rest in peace (or pieces, I suppose).

  8. says

    I have not yet chopped Clark up, and I resent being called a right leaning anarcho-capitalist. I am a center right leaning anarcho-redistributionist with leanings towards distributing towards myself!

  9. says

    All these folks who waited for the shutdown to stock up on neighbors' goodies (and the occasional neighbor) displayed poor planning. Y'all should have grabbed the neighbors' loot during the last couple of Camping's Raptures like I did. (The Mayan Calendar Apocalypse was a bust, since most folks around here didn't buy into that pagan stuff. Darn it.)

    One of the neighbors does have a pony, but I'm waiting until things get desperate before I stalk, kill, and butcher it. Those things are dangerous.

  10. says

    I gotta ask, "Who is Clark? Clark Kent?"

    I hope the shutdown does not stop the man of steel.

    Wayne

    luvsiesous.wordpress.com

  11. Myk says

    @Bear

    One of the neighbors does have a pony, but I'm waiting until things get desperate before I stalk, kill, and butcher it. Those things are dangerous.

    Rather than killing it, try to trap it. A good supply of venom could come in handy for arrow tips and mantraps.

  12. That Anonymous Coward says

    I has a sad.
    You are all acting like something must have befallen Clark, and I think this is exactly what he wanted.
    He is plotting in a secret lair somewhere, and when your concern reaches a fever pitch… he will strike.

    Cry havoc and let slip the shetland ponies of war!

  13. says

    Crap, it looks like we lost Clark and Patrick Non-White. At least Ken's still alive but I heard a posse of Apocalyptic Ponies were seen in the parking lot near his office. Hopefully the cops doing traffic work in his favor in case of an ambush.

  14. I was Anonymous says

    The JLA is meeting this week.

    <VOICEOVER type="reverb">
    Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom…
    </VOICEOVER>

  15. HamOnRye says

    Where did you guys get the picture of an IRS auditor? I thought all the federal websites were down?

  16. Aaron says

    @Ryan

    XKCD is nearly always spot on and quite funny. Especially the hover-over text. Always a hoot!