That's the Last Time I Fly Prince Albert Airlines

Defender of all things feminine Gloria Allred has a new client – a woman who alleges that she was handed a pair of pliers and told to remove her nipple rings manually, before she could board a flight at LAX. First of all, ouch! Second of all, what?

The TSA won't deny that this might have happened, but hasn't heard about it. Apparently if jewelry is large enough to set off the metal detectors, they won't be allowed through until they remove it. This leads me to wonder just how large these nipple rings are. It also leads me to wonder what evil terrorism could be wrought with nipple rings. Why, I bet radical muslims everywhere are going to rush out & get nipple rings now. Nipple rings must be banned for our freedom!

Last 5 posts by Ezra


  1. says

    This tempts me to post my worst-airline-experience-ever, which involves not my flight but my prosecution for interference with a flight crew of a ring-encrusted woman.

    Unfortunately it's still on the internet, despite reaching its nadir 10 years ago, so I won't risk blowing my cover.